So I realized the other day that I have yet to write one of the most IMPORTANT blogs out there!  So here it is:)

 

In case you haven't realized it yet, the most important man in my life is my dad!!  Rich Kash (yeah pretty freaking awesome name-right)!  Actually his full name is Richard Mason Kash, Jr. A great attorney name and good thing because he's an attorney.  And here is one of my favorite pictures of him.  Yeah my dad is pretty awesome:)

 

So this blog is all about my great daddy!  He has had a HUGE impact on my life, and I've never said why I love and appreciate him so much so that's what I'm planning on doing.  So sit back and enjoy reading a little about Richy Rich!

 

My dad was born some time ago (and no I won't tell you when), but amazingly enough he still has a FULL head of hair although it's all white.  But according to dad that means he's wise!  So yeah we'll roll with it:)  I was going to tell you some facts about my amazing father, but I decided I'm just gonna stick to what I like most  about him.  So here's all the reasons I like him!  Oh and here's a quick disclaimer, some of this information might be wrong.  I've been realizing recently that what I grew up thinking I knew is slightly off!  So what I write might be completely wrong, but it's what I grew up with so yeah-just roll with it:)

 

1.  My dad has crazy, awesome skills when he picked out a wife.  Actually thank the Lord my mom was just so crazy hot he couldn't resist her.  So here's the story.  My aunt showed my dad 2 pictures of single women (1 being my mom and 1 being another lady) and fortunately dad picked my mom.  Now he'll probably deny this, but do NOT believe him!  This is the real story:)  And I'm pretty sure this is ligit!  And here's the happy couple!

 

2.  He has the cutest little grin-just look at the picture above:)

 

3.  Growing up my dad food dyed all sorts of food.  Mash potatoes, pancakes, waffles, and tons of other stuff!  It was awesome, although whenever we made colored pancakes we always had to make mom regular ones.  She said it changed the flavor-she's crazy:)

 

4.  My dad always came up with stories about where food came from.  Such as french fries.  The story would go something like this.  There was a french man whose last name was Fries.  And blah, blah, blah.  Everything had a story like this.  I clearly remember sitting around the dining room table listening to my dad tell these stories.  I also remember truly believing every word he said.  And to this day, I still believe it;)

 

5.  My father rarely missed any of my sporting events growing up.  It didn't matter if he had tons of case work and had been at work all day, my dad was always there.  I could always look in the stands and see him.  Although most of the time I acted like I hated it, I really loved it!

 

6.  My dad was my softball coach my entire life.  This definitely had its pros and cons, but I'm so blessed to have had him there with me.  Oh the softball memories.  I can still see my dad showing us how to slide.  I never thought in a million years he'd actually do it, but he ran and slid into second base.  I was so impressed!

 

7.  After any sporting event my dad loves to debrief it for the next hour.  He can recall, with accurate detail, nearly every play.  What he doesn't realize is that everyone cannot and does not want to do that:)  Hint hint dad.  Thank goodness for Nathan and his love and passion for sports.  They can dissect a game for hours!

 

8.  His nose.  Ok so that's a lie.  I do NOT love his nose because I have the same exact nose!  It's huge!  So yeah thanks a whole lot for that dad:(

 

9.  His favorite movie is "The Christmas Story"!  And if you ever get the chance you should watch it with him.  He does this AWESOME reenactment of the Chinese men in the Chinese restaurant for the Christmas dinner.  My dad has quite the asian accent-fra, ra, ra, ra, ra.....:)

 

10.  My dad also LOVES "West Side Story".  He remembers watching it in the theater-I'm so jealous!  I wish I could have seen in on the big screen.  And I'm pretty sure the reason my father loves it so much is because he wishes he was one of the Jets.  Can't you see it now-Rich Kash wearing some rolled up jeans, with a tight shirt, singing and dancing around:)  Oh yeah-awesome!

 

11.  I love the way my dad gets laughing so hard that he starts weezing!  Oh my gosh-HILARIOUS!  His face gets all red, his eyes start crying, and then the weezing starts:)  The first time I noticed it was on a mission trip to Arizona.  Oh the memories!

 

12.  He thinks he is the funniest man alive.  Ok I hate to say this, but it's basically true.  Even when I roll my eyes because of the ridiculous things my dad says, I'm still uncontrollably laughing inside.  He his really funny!!  So there you go Dad, the cat's out of the bag-I think you're funny:)

 

13.  He has the greatest nickname-Lance Romance!  I have no idea where that came from so you'll have to ask him.

 

14.  My dad wants me to never cut my hair and always leave it curly.  This probably has something to do with the fact that he has has the SAME hair style for the past 30+ years!  He's ridiculous:)

 

15.  I clearly remember they day Kendall went to to kindergarten.  I was so upset because I had no one to watch "My Little Ponies" with, so my dad stayed and watched it with me.  I don't know too many fathers who would delay going to work by 1/2 an hour to watch "My Little Ponies".  He is truly an amazing man!

 

16.  I'm his baby girl!  And he would do anything for me!  And when I say anything, I mean anything.  Actually he would do ANYTHING for any of his kids.  I can't say that about too many fathers these days.

 

17.  My father is a true example of a Godly man.  He knows he has his faults and he still works through them.  This is one of his greatest qualities!

 

18.  My dad has a true passion for the Lord, and I can clearly see that in him.

 

19.  I know without a shadow of a doubt that my dad would kill any boy that breaks my heart!  So no man better ever break my heart!!

 

20.  One last funny thing about him.  For as far back as I can remember, we have always made German chocolate cake for his birthday.  I always figured it was his favorite because he made it every year.  Well come to find out, just recently, my dad doesn't really even like it.  He's just been eating it ever year.  And I'm not kidding-I can't even think of a time we didn't have that:)  But that's my dad.  Even though it's HIS birthday he doesn't make a fuss and just eats it!  LOL  He's so funny!

 

So there are some reasons why I love my dad.  This list is DEFINITELY not all of them, but just some that came to my head as I wrote.  Bascially my dad is a superstar!  I love him dearly and I never say that enough.  I've been told that I have way too high expectations for guys to date.  And the reason why is because I'm waiting for one that's just as great as my dad!  I'll consider myself lucky if I get a guy half as good!  I know that's cheesy, but it's completely true!  So I want to end with,

 

So I'm not quite sure how much you know about spiritual warfare, angels, or demons.  Truth be told, I don't really know a whole lot either.  But God has really been working in me the past couple of days on this issue and I figured that I'd share my journey with you!  So sit back and enjoy:)  But also read at your own risk-God might just start moving your heart and teaching you new things in this area!

 

So it all started a few days ago.  I was looking at our bookshelf trying to decide what book to read.  First off I love reading and I haven't really read a whole lot since I've been here, so I had this huge desire to read something.  As I was looking over my books, I couldn't decide between Ted Dekker's Black or Frank Peretti's This Present Darkness.  I was really leaning towards Black because it's one of my FAVORITE books ever, but at the last second I decided on This Present Darkness.  I've picked this book up numerous times in the past, but I never really got past the fourth chapter.  So I figured I'd try starting it yet again.  And this time was completely different.  I couldn't put the book down.  On Thursday night, Friday, and Saturday I spent hours reading.  I couldn't stop.  Every chapter brought on new excitement and anticipation on what would happen next. 

 

Ok I have to stop here and put this disclaimer out.  I am not saying that Frank Peretti's This Present Darkness is all anyone needs to know about spiritual warfare.  It isn't all the answers and I do not believe that or am I in any way trying to convey that.  I'm just saying that it is a great place to start.  It's an intriguing fiction novel that keeps the reader on his/her seat not knowing what will come next.  With that said, here's the rest of my story!

 

So anyway, the first really cool thing that happened was on Friday night.  As I was laying in my bed, I got this conviction to speak out loud different demons that were in the ComLife and even more specifically in my room.  I spoke with a new boldness knowing my authority was in Christ.  And I said out loud, "Demon of _____, you have no authority in me!  In Christ's name I command you to leave this house!"  Ok so I have no idea if that's the "proper" way or whatever to go about doing this, but I can say without a doubt that something was different in me.  I spent the next minutes/hour just praising God and all he is.  I felt a new power within me and I knew that something had changed.  It was incredible and it was DEFINTELY God!!!

 

On Saturday I woke up feeling great.  I went back to my book and kept reading and reading until I had finished.  It was amazing!  I know that God used this book and this weekend to really open my eyes to something that I've never really opened my eyes to before.  Before I continue I really push that EVERYONE should read this book.  Once again it is not the answers to spiritual warfare, but it's a great tool to use to get your mind thinking!

 

And that's my story.  Pretty cool huh?!  Well yes it it, but crazily enough it gets even better.  As I opened my email after reading This Present Darkness, I had an update alert from a world racer at training camp.  Here's some background info for you.  The World Race is a facet of AIM where participants go to 11 countries in 11 months.  If you want more info on it, feel free!  Before we send these people out, they come to AIM to have a training camp.  During training camp they get to know their team, get to know themself, and truly get to know God and see Him move!  As I was saying I got an update alert that one of the participants going out on the World Race June had posted a blog.  And I opened it up and read an amazing blog-God is truly amazing!  And this blog is what's posted below.  If you want to know more about Taylor Griffith (the writer of this blog), please feel free to go to his page.

 

 

 

As I said, God is truly amazing!  This was the perfect end to the beginning for me.  I know that this stuff can get pretty creepy and scarry.  I won't lie.  As I read Taylor's blog I was petrified.  I could only think, "Wow this stuff doesn't happen in real life!  It only happens in movies and books."  But I know that God is bigger and better and has WAY more authority.  I have nothing to fear!  For I know God is on my side.  So if this blog brings you fear, doubt, or any of another hundred of feelings I ask that you take it to the Lord.  That's where I'm at right now.  I don't pretend to know it all or actually anything at all.  But here is what I do know-God is the ultimate winner and He's on my side!  What else do I need:)

Here's song number 2!  Enjoy:)

 

~Kels

 

So as I mentioned in my last blog, I've been having some hard times.  But I've had some AWESOME times of worship and have come upon 2 amazing songs that I'd like to share with you.  So I encourage you to really listen to the songs and read the lyrics.  As I heard these songs for the first time, I thought to myself, "WOW did I write these songs because this is exactly like my life right now!"  They're great encouragements for me!  Hope you enjoy :)

 

Finding Hope in God

~Kelsey

 

P.S. I can't get the clips and lyrics formatted as I want it so here's the first song.  My next blog will be the second one!

 

Last week was the worst week since I've been here.  It started with my sister leaving on Tuesday after coming to visit me for the weekend.  Don't get me wrong, I loved having her here, but it was hard to see her go.  I was extremely close to climbing in the car with her and heading back home.  While she was here, it really hit me how much I'm missing from being away from my family back in Illinois.  One sister is having a baby in May and it will be the first grandchild of the family, another sister is graduating from college in May and who knows what she'll be doing after that, one brother just got his license, and another brother is starting soccer up again and I won't be able to watch him play and see how amazing he is!  (I'm not bragging-Gabe is a FANTASTIC soccer player!)  And then there are all the day to day things I miss from being away from home.  Like getting 2 new puppies, sitting on the quad with Kendall, or shopping with my mom.  That all hit me as Katie, my sister, was climbing in the car heading back home. 

 So I went back to work and my "normal" life here in Gainesville, but instead of loving or even liking where I was, I started disliking, even hating, everything.  I didn't want to be here, I didn't want to be part of ComLife, I didn't want to do anything or be anywhere besides back in Marshall, Illinois with the Kash family!  As the week went on, I just kept slipping more and more into this depression-like state.  I was getting annoyed at everyone and I just needed space, which is EXTREMELY hard to come by when you live with 11 people and work with them every day.  By Friday I was running on empty in all parts of my life-physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally.  I needed an escape and I needed it quick!  So last Saturday I declared it Kelsey day.  I was going to be by myself and not talk to anyone.  Thankfully everyone else in the house left early in the morning to go hiking, so I had the house to myself for a bit.  I slept in, sat on the couch and watched a movie, and then decided to get ready for the day.  I then went and sat at a park, contemplating my life.  It came down to me being once again pissed at God and just wanting answers.  I found myself asking over and over again why am I here?  I was looking for a DEFINITE answer and it really never came.  So even though I was taking this day aside to rejuvenate, I was getting angrier and angrier.  I then decided to go see a movie by myself.  It was a great way to forget life for a few hours, but then the movie stopped and once again life took over.  I drove back to the park with music blaring and sat in the parking lot listening to music.  Music usually calms me down, but not so much this time.  I thought I felt better, but as soon as I walked back in the house I was extremely agitated again.  My day had been everything I was wanting it to be-quiet, lonely, me-time-but I didn't get my feeling of rejuvenation.  I figured I was just going to have another crappy week.  I went to bed Saturday night still confused and upset!

Then Sunday morning came.  I laid in bed for a bit not planning on going to church.  I was mad at everyone, including God, and church was the last place I wanted to be.  At the last second I decided being out of the house was better than being in the house, so I went to church.  As soon as the worship started I knew this is what I had been looking for the previous day.  I sang the songs with all my heart and had sometime to just be in my Father's presence.  I left church with a lighter step.  My questions weren't answered, I still didn't know why I was here, but there was something different.  Later that evening, I went to another church service and got to worship with Chris Tomlin and Matt Redman and Louie Giglio preached.  I can honestly say the reason that service was amazing had nothing to do with the names of people on stage, but had everything to do with God being in that place.  I was once again connected with God in a great way.  And that was my Sunday-being in the presence of God.

I went to bed on Sunday night feeling much better and slightly rejuvenated.  I don't want it to come off like all my problems were solved and I was so happy to be in Gainesville.  But at least I wasn't so pissed off at the world anymore.  As I was lying in my bed, thinking of my weekend a thought entered my mind.  I had spent all day Saturday looking for love and had not found it because I was looking in all the wrong places.  For the first time in my life I could understand girls who sleep around, people addicted to drugs who feel they NEED to forget their lives, and everyone else in the world who feels empty inside.  I had spent my Saturday feeling hopeless and empty and had tried to fill that void with music, movies, and me!  And still at the end of the day, I felt empty and hopeless.  I could not find anything to make me feel better.  No wonder girls go from guy to guy trying to fill the void of love in their lives or addicts need fixes daily to get out of reality as much as they can.  If I felt that sense of hopelessness and emptiness day in and day out for weeks, I'd resort to the same things.  I'd do ANYTHING to feel better, even if it meant for only a short period of time.  But thankfully I don't have to resort to those things.  I have the answer to it all-God!  He is the endless supply of love and hope that we need every day.  He is always there in those days that seem unbearable for us.  He's there when we're at the end of our rope and have no where else to turn.  HE IS ALWAYS THERE.  It's just whether or not we acknowledge Him.  I'm sure I'm going to need to be reminded of this in a few short weeks.  But as of right now I'm finding encouragement and courage in my new realization.  I hope you do too!

Hello Blog Readers!!

 

I am well aware that it's been over a month since I've blogged anything.  Sorry!  But I just haven't really felt like blogging a whole lot-yes I know LAME excuse!  I've been really convicted recently about it though so I'm gonna try to at least blog 4 times a week.  Hopefully that will work out.  But you might have to keep me accountable.  So to start things up again, I'm just gonna do a fun blog:)  Hope you enjoy!

 

I've come from a family of playing games.  Whether it's Phase 10, Sorry, Gestures, Apples to Apples or the Wii, my family loves to pile around and start playing.  It usually ends with all of us extremely upset at one another because of our EXTREMELY competitive nature, but nonetheless we love games!  Since I've been a part of ComLife I've come across some pretty AWESOME games, which I'm going to share with you.  So if you're in need of some laughter and fun at your next shin-dig, feel free to play one of these games:)  Trust me, you'll have a blast!

 

Ok the first game is called MURDER IN THE DARK!

Murder in the dark is similar to Mafia the card game.  But this way is a MILLION times more fun!!!  So to play this game you need three things: (1) COMPLETE darkness, (2) a deck of cards, and (3) a marked off place to play-could be a back yard, several rooms in a house, an entire house, whatever.  So you'll need as many cards from the deck for as many players that are playing and you need to make sure one card is a jack.  For example, if there's 8 people playing you'll need 8 cards with one being a jack.  You will then pass out the cards to all the players.  Whoever gets the jack is the killer.  That person wants to remain anonymous!!!  Everyone else are the townspeople that might be murdered by the killer. 

 

 So once everyone has their cards, you turn off the lights and start walking around.  Everyone wants to stay away from everyone else because they don't know who the killer is and you don't want to be killed.  Everyone also needs to remain SILENT!!  Talking will ruin the game.  So everyone is walking around trying to stay away from each other, and the killer is on the loose:)  The killer's job is to be killing people and try not to get caught.  So once the lights go out and everyone is walking around, the killer will walk around until he/she finds someone they want to kill.  When they find that person, they hold onto the person's elbow/arm for 5 seconds or so.  The person who was then "killed" has to wait 10 seconds until they fall down dead claiming "I've been murdered!!"  This 10 seconds gives the killer time to get away. 

 

The townspeople will then turn on the lights and they need to try and decide who the killer is.  This is how it's like Mafia.  After the majority of the townspeople feel like they know who the killer is they choose that person to kill.  So that person "dies"!  If this person is the killer, then the townspeople win and the game ends.  BUT if this person is not the killer and just an innocent townsperson then the game continues.  The lights are shut off, everyone starts walking around again, and the killer kills someone else.  You keep doing this over and over again until (1) the townspeople kill the killer or (2) the killer has killed off the entire town!!

 

I know the game doesn't sound like fun, but it really is.  Just try it once and you'll love it!!!

 

 

The second game is called PICTIONARY TELEPHONE!

Regular pictionary and telephone are my two LEAST favorite games, but when they're mixed together it's absolutely hilarious!  This is a sit down, less interactive game.  It's kind of confusing to explain, but I'll do my best.  For explaining sake, I'm going to say there are 5 people playing this game.  So everyone is sitting in a circle, and each player needs 5 pieces of paper.  (If there were 10 people playing then everyone would need 10 pieces of paper, 13 players then everyone would need 13 pieces of paper, and so on)  The pieces of paper don't need to be that big-the size of your hand or so would work.  So you could tear a normal piece of paper into 4-8 pieces.  And everyone needs a writing utensil.  Ok so the 5 players have their 5 pieces of paper in a stack.  Everyone writes whatever phrase they want on the first piece of paper.  The phrase can be anything from a saying to song lyrics to a basketball team-whatever you want it to be. 

 

So everyone has their phrase written down.  Then everyone passes their WHOLE stack of papers (in this case, ALL 5 papers) to the person on their left.  So the person to your left has the stack of papers that has your phrase on it and you now have 5 papers with someone else's phrase on it.  (Hopefully that made sense:))  Now you have to draw on the next paper whatever the phrase is.  So say I get a stack of papers and the top one says "The Ugly Duckling".  I put the paper that SAYS the ugly duckling on the bottom of the stack of papers and then I have to somehow draw the ugly duckling.  So the new top piece of paper is a picture. 

 

So now everyone's top piece of paper is their drawing.  Once again everyone passes the WHOLE stack of papers to the left.  So what you'll see is a picture.  You then have to write WORDS that you think the picture is representing.  For example, I get a picture of a really pretty girl and an ugly animal looking thing.  So I would put the piece of paper with the drawing on the bottom of the stack of papers and then I would write on the new top card "Beauty and the Beast".  More often than not, you're going to have to just guess what you think the picture is, but that's what makes it so great!

 

Ok so everyone now has words on their top card of what they think the picture was.  Once again you pass and you then draw a picture of what the words are.  And it keeps going back and forth like that-writing words on what you think the picture is and then drawing a picture based on the words.  You keep doing this and passing until the all the pieces of paper have something on them.  Each person should end up with the stack of papers that they started.  So you can look through you stack of pieces of paper and see how your phrase has morphed into something else completely.  It's so funny.  The last time I played someone started with "I love hunting" and it turned into "A grandma who loves to kill cats!"  Looking through this digression was so hilarious!  It would probably be tons funnier if you there.  But you can have your own fun when playing the game.

 

Here's just a few more rules:

You can NOT write any words or numbers when drawing pictures!

You can NOT look back at previous pieces of papers to look at different pictures or words.

      You have to work with the ONE piece of paper in front of you-it makes the game!

 

Um...yeah I think that's it.  I hope that was as clear as mud for you:)  If you are interested I could probably give better directions over the phone or I'm sure my fellow ComLifers would love to comment their inputs on here so that might help!

 

So there's 2 games I have learned thus far!  They have been so much fun for me, and I hope they bring tons of entertainment for you!  If they don't, (1) you're probably playing the game wrong because whoever gave you the directions was an idiot or (2) you're a party pooper-it'll probably be reason number 2!  Well thanks for reading.  I'll be posting another, more serious blog soon.  Much love and have an AWESOME day!!!-Kelsey Kash

Community. A simple word, but yet very complex. What exactly is community? Is it living with people, a neighborhood, the people you work with, or is it whole towns? According to Wikipedia (yeah that's right-WIKI!!), community is a group of interacting organisms sharing an environment or a group of interacting people living in a common location. Really? Is that truthfully what community is? People living together and interacting? Is that really what I came down here to Georgia to find out-to learn to live with people? And the answer is yes, that's EXACTLY why I came to Georgia!

I believe we all need to relearn how to live together. Living together isn't the same thing as living your life while being in the same area as another. I think anyone could do that. All you have to do is be centered around yourself and live your life for you. But that is NOT community! Look at the word. The Latin prefix com means together. Together is closely, collectively, as one, and united. It is not apart, separately, or individually. So many people today live individually and think they are living "together". It is the way many of us were raised, but as a body of believers we MUST break that mold and truly come together. Look at Acts 2:42-47. It talks of the early Church being a unified body of believers. They shared in everything, helping every member of the body. 

N.T. Wright writes in Acts for Everyone: Part One, "The earliest Christians lived as a single family. When you live together as a family under one roof, you don't see this chair, this table, this bottle of milk, this loaf of bread, as ‘mine' rather than ‘yours'. The breadwinners in the household don't see the money they bring in as ‘theirs' rather than belonging to the whole household. That's part of what it means to be family."

The early believers had it right. Today, Christians commonly refer to ourselves as a body of believers. That's ONE body. But if we look at it, how untrue is that statement. How can we call ourselves a unified body, when we consciously make decisions to not help a brother or sister because it might not benefit us or it might be uncomfortable for us?

And I'm calling myself out. I'm awful at this. I see where I can help, but I don't because it would upset my little world. I choose to turn a deaf ear and blind eye to make sure my life isn't interrupted. But I would never do this to my biological family, so why would I even consider doing it to my spiritual family? 

This is why I am in Georgia. I'm relearning what it means to live together, and through that I am learning for the first time what it truly means to have brothers and sisters in Christ. And just like a biological family we have our share of fights and flaws, but at the end of the day, we love each other. And that's what matters the most.

So although community can be defined in numerous ways, I believe community is family-nothing more and nothing less. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kels 

If you every came to a Sunday School class for the sr. high at Marshall First Christian about 4-6 years ago, there's a really great chance that you were taught a lesson from the book Theirs Is The Kingdom by Robert D. Lupton. You might remember everyone ridiculing Tim about teaching from this book and whatnot. This is one of Tim's favorite books (or so I believe), and the truth is that the book is really quite good. I think we were all just giving him a hard time because that's what you're supposed to do to your youth minister.

Anyway, so I've been reading through Theirs Is The Kingdom this week. And I came to a very interesting chapter. The title is An Invitation To Suffering. It's only about a page long so I'm going to put it on here. So here it is:

                I do not like pain. Not in any form. Loneliness, sickness (my own or another's), anxiety, frustration, disappointment, hurt-these are not the companions with which I choose to share my life. I actively avoid them. I buy drugs from my pharmacist to shield me from physical pain. I surround myself with people like myself who dispel my loneliness and reassure me that I am OK. I control my contacts with people who take more than they give. I schedule my days to eliminate disruptions and to accomplish the things I think significant or pleasurable. A theology of abundance, peace, and health has enormous appeal to me.

                Recently I witnessed a small act in the drama of city life that both moved and troubled me deeply. It was a familiar situation. A family with three small children was evicted again for nonpayment of rent. Their ritual "put me up for just tonight" had been used once too often. With no money for bargaining, the only place they could find to stay was a front porch. The father slept under a bush. Although I was quite unwilling to give them any more, I wondered what would become of them.

                Then an unbelievable but predictable event occurred. An unemployed brother whose own family was barely surviving took his evicted relatives in. Once again it was those who could least afford extra mouths to feed and were already crowded to the point of eviction who found it in their hearts to help. Even more disturbing to me was the cost of caring: increased hunger; hot, sleepless nights made even more unbearable by crying babies and wall-to-wall bodies; the stench of inadequate sanitation; short tempers; constant confusion.

                This picture still burns in my mind. It is a haunting reminder of the energy I spend avoiding the cost of loving others. I establish an emergency relief fund instead of inviting hungry families to sit at my table. I develop a housing program to avoid the turmoil of displaced families living in my home. I create employment projects that distance me from the aggravation of working with undisciplined people. As a counselor I maintain some detachment with a fifty-minute hour and an emphasis on client self-responsibility. And even as I share the gospel with the needy, I secretly hope that God will handle their problems.

                Of course I don't allow myself to think this way very often. I choose rather to concentrate on the positive things I am doing for people, helpful things, right things. But when I am honest with myself, I must admit that I cannot fully care for one who is suffering without entering into his pain. The sick must be touched if they are to be healed. The weak must be nourished, the wounded embraced. Care is the bigger part of cure.

                Yet I fear contagion. I fear my life will get out of control and I will be overwhelmed by the urgent affairs of others. I fear for my family. I resist the Christ who beckoned his followers to lay down their lives for each other. His talk of a yoke, a cross, of bearing one another's burdens and giving one's self away is not attractive to me. The implications of entering this world of suffering as a "Christ-one," as yeast absorbed into the loaf of human need, are as terrifying as death itself. Yet this is the only way to life. The question is, will I choose life?

As I read and reread this chapter, I can't shake the feeling that God is saying something to me. I find myself falling into the same mindset that Robert Lupton writes about. I don't want to feel the pain and sorrow of others. And I find myself believing that I can help people from afar. That I can keep them at arm's length and do them good. And the sad fact is that I'm kidding myself. Keeping people "out of my bubble" accomplishes nothing. In fact I believe that it might be tearing down the Kingdom rather than raising it up. Don't get me wrong, organizations and projects are great. Heck I wouldn't be where I am now if I thought that way. But we must remember that we need to be AMONG the people to really help them.  The hard part is we know that this won't be easy.  We will have to CHOOSE to take the hardships and pain to truly be part of the people.

I think the last paragraph really says it all. So I encourage you to reread this paragraph daily. Take it to heart and start living it out. I'm also challenging myself to do the same thing. And once we do that, we can really start living!  Any takers?