So I had a 9 hour drive to think about the first time I would get to meet my housemates and fellow Community Lifers. After all first impressions are everything, right? I wondered how I would perceive them, how they’d perceive me, and all those things. I had countless scenarios running through my head. But I had never thought of the scenario that would actually took place.
I left good ol’ Marshall town around 9:30 am (2 hours later then I wanted, but oh well). I set off with numerous thoughts running through my head. I was scared, excited, and nervous. For the first time I was going to be on my own, I was going to a place I knew nothing about with people I didn’t know, and I was already missing my family. After 8 hours of easy driving, I found myself in the mountains of Georgia. Not only was I in the mountains, but it was pitch black in the middle of nowhere. I would seriously see a car about every 15 minutes or so. But I just kept following my MapQuest directions (that was my first mistake). After an hour and a half of driving around with no idea where I was, I started panicking. Now for those back home, you have no idea what I’m talking about being lost in the mountains. I’ve been lost in Illinois, but that’s all flat. Not here! Everything is up and down, up and down and there’s only a random house every 15 miles or so. I was in a perfect place for a horror movie. Just try to imagine that. So I’m driving around lost and all alone. Then I looked down and realized that my gas gauge was almost on E. That’s when I really started to panic. I couldn’t remember the last time I saw a gas station. So I went in total prayer. I started crying to God to just let me come upon a gas station soon. Thankfully I found one a few minutes after that. I got gas and then decided to go inside to get some directions. To my disbelief I was still half an hour away from Gainesville and to make matters worse he didn’t know how to get there. I got back in my car completely heartbroken. For the past two hours I was supposedly less than 15 minutes from Gainesville, or so I thought according to my directions. I was tired, lost, and starting to doubt if I had made the right choice to even go to Georgia. Then my mom called, and that’s when I completely lost it. I just broke down right then and there. If you know me at all, you know that I’m not one to cry. Well not now. I was bawling like I was a baby. My mom calmed me down and prayed with me. When I got off the phone with her I came upon another gas station. I went inside and the woman pointed me in the right direction. I got back in the car, but I was still thoroughly upset. I was still crying my eyes out because I was so mad at everything. Needless to say I finally arrived at the house in Gainesville around 9 pm or so. And how did my roommates meet me, with tears in my eyes and puffy, red cheeks. A great first impression, don’t you think?
So my entrance wasn’t as grand as I would have liked it to be. I didn’t appear to be this confident young lady that I like for people to see me as. Instead I came broken and at my weakest moment. I probably appeared more as a small child than anything else. And now that I think about it, what really hits me is that’s how we’re supposed to come to God, completely broken and weak. It might be embarrassing and not the way we want God to see us, but truthfully He doesn’t want us any other way. Because underneath all our facades, we are these helpless, crying children that just need their Daddy. Which was exactly what I needed that night.
But anyway don’t worry. I’m writing this blog a full 24 hours since I’ve been to Gainesville and everything is great. It’s amazing what a good night’s sleep can do for you. My roommates, Kelsey and Shaye, are great people, and thankfully they still accept me even though I seemed like a crazy mess last night. We’re going to have one heck of a year!